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Networking For Success
Networking is the process of developing and using your contacts for information, advice, moral support and sales leads. "Effective networking involves a strong combination of skill and luck; a willingness to take the occasional risk to forge good contacts; energy; openness to other people and their needs; and constant awareness of the opportunity for give and take in every setting," according to Ruth Thaler carter, author of "Networking for Success." The most common reservation about networking is "Why should I waste my time standing around talking to people when I could be doing something more constructive to build business." If done effectively, networking can be your second best method of making money second only to direct cash sales. Even if you think you don't need help with your business, networking can make you feel more comfortable and be more effective where you are. It can change your whole way of thinking about what it takes to succeed in business, according to Mary Scott Welch, author of Networking. You can expect to leave with rewards of information, referrals and feedback. "Because the information you receive from networking is offered free and is shared, you must be prepared to do something free in exchange for it. The key is not to let networks get cold. Stay in touch. Stay active. Stay visible," Thaler Carter said.
How Does Networking Differ from Chit Chat?
The main purpose of networking is to connect on a professional level for professional gain. There is an unwritten law that says keep your husband and children out of your conversation unless they are part of the referral for the contact. (For example, "I understand you're an orthodontist, Dr. Smith. My daughter may need braces.") Appropriate small talk is of current events, sports, hobbies, leisure time interests, films and the meeting you are attending. Inappropriate conversation would be the three Ds and the three Cs: death, disease, domestics, criticism, children and confidences. By following the Guidelines of Networking (see page 2), you will leave a meeting with at least a lot of new contacts and probably a lot of new customers.
How to Introduce Yourself
Say your name clearly and often. This saves your new acquaintance the effort of leaning forward and peering at your name tag, which breaks the eye contact so necessary to getting acquainted. Also, networker's usually use first names right away. This perpetuates the personal contact feeling.
Joining Networking Groups
As a member, you will pay a registration fee and monthly dues. Network chapters usually meet weekly, and to avoid internal competition, each chapter allows only one business in each field to join. If there is not a group already formed in your area, you might even consider starting one yourself.
How to Hear It Through the Grapevine Imagine this scenario: Everywhere you go people approach you and want to do business with you. No more cold calls or hardcore selling. All your business comes directly from people you know or referrals from satisfied customers and acquaintances. Sound like a fantasy? When you and your employees become effective networkers, business can come to you that easily. Networking is one of the most powerful marketing tools that a company can use, because people prefer to do business with people they know. Think about it would you pick an accountant or a financial planner out of the Yellow Pages and trust the care of all your assets to this person? Hopefully, your answer is no. Rather, you would ask your friends for suggestions or wait to meet someone feel comfortable with at a business or social function. The term "networking" was popularized by John Nesbitt's book Megatrends (Warner Books). Basically, it's a new term for an old behavior using your contacts to share information and resources. In its simplest form, you are networking any time you exchange knowledge and ideas with someone. However, the term is traditionally used in the context of networking at business organization meetings usually for sales. We will define the term more broadly to include networking for anything you need: employees, information, vendors, etc. The underlying principle is: "It's not what you know, but who you know that counts." Phil Siegel, president of Irvine, Calif.based Consolidated Reprographics, a reprographic service company with annual revenues exceeding $20 million, claims that networking was imperative in getting his business off the ground 25 years ago. "All my assignments came from referrals from friends," Siegel says. "Then I joined the local Rotary Club and Chamber of Commerce, and [the business] took off from there."
"A network is a community of interests, a group which shares the success orientation and is proud of it . . . Perhaps the most important function that networking provides is the openingup of legitimate uses of another's skills. It is hardly possible for a group of different careerists to understand what each other does."
Barbara Stern "Is Networking For You?"
Tips For Effective Networking
1. Always carry your business cards with you. Networking opportunities can present themselves at parties, at church or in elevators. 2. Talk to everyone everywhere. You never know who someone is until you start speaking with them. For example, I met one of my best public relations clients in front of the merrygoround in a local mall. 3. Don't sit with friends at meetings. You can speak with them any time. Try to sit by new people at each networking function so you can get to know them. 4. Set a goal to meet five (or more) new people at each networking meeting. Most groups have a social/networking time before the official meeting starts. Make it a point to approach and exchange business cards with people you don't know. 5. Be a good listener. Listening has become a lost art. Everyone is in such a hurry to make a sale that they forget one important point: You can't "sell" to someone until you get to know them first. Most people won't do business with strangers, so become a friend. 6. Focus on others. What can you do to help them? Introduce them to someone you know; find out what their needs are and make suggestions; give them a referral for their product or service. 7. Build your people skills. How would you like to be treated? Be friendly, sincere, warm, caring . . . all the qualities you like in others whom you consider friends. 8. Think of networking as an investment one that will pay off down the road. Make friends when you don't need them; then they will be there when you do require help. Don't expect a lot of business from your first networking meeting. It doesn't work like that. You are still unknown to people the first few times they meet you. 9. Make networking an active behavior. Being a wallflower is not effective in a business situation. Make the effort to reach out your hand first. You'll be surprised how relieved other people look because they are afraid no one will talk to them. 10. Volunteer your expertise to the group. The best way to become known in an organization is to be active and visible. Become a board member or get on a committee. If you don't have much time to donate, help sign people in or assist with hospitality at the meeting. Think in terms of acting like a host or hostess. If you're shy, this has the double benefit of giving you something to do and a reason to talk to people. 11. Be concise and memorable when you introduce yourself. There's no greater turnoff than someone who brags about his business especially if you can't understand what he's talking about. Talk in "layman's terms," without industry jargon, and keep it simple. You might say something funny, clever, or different so that people will remember what you do. 12. Visit new business organizations regularly. Opportunities increase as you make yourself available to new groups of people. Even if you're not prospecting for business, you can make contacts for the future or pick up a vital piece of information that affects your company.
Where To Network You can network anywhere people congregate. The following are good places to start: 1. Chambers of Commerce. There are membership organizations whose purpose is to promote business on a local basis. To this end, they hold mixers, business development breakfasts, and other events so that members get to know each other (and do business together). 2. (Sales) Leads Clubs or Networking Groups. This type of group is wonderful for sales people, professionals and small business owners. Typically, a leads club will meet once a week, allow only one member per category (one chiropractor, one printer, etc.), and everyone is required to bring referrals for each other. It's like having free sales people who are keeping their eyes peeled for potential business for you. 3. Trade Organizations. These are industry specific groups that usually have monthly lunch or dinner meetings, e.g. Building Industry Association, American Society of Interior Designers. The beauty of networking this type of club is that this is where the decision makers of major companies congregate. You may sit by a corporation's president or director of marketing who you could never get through to on the telephone. Keep in mind that this is usually a sophisticated group of people and any kind of "sales pitch" would be inappropriate. These people are usually at the meeting to hobnob with their peers and to keep up with the latest industry trends. Use a little finesse get their card and call for an appointment later. 4. Professional Women's Organizations. Examples of these are the National Association for Professional Saleswomen, National Association of Women in Construction and International Business and Profession Women. These groups are wonderful support mechanisms for business woman (and men are frequently welcome). Both trade organizations and women's groups provide ongoing educational opportunities, from national conventions to certification and accreditation programs, which can add to your industry knowledge and overall business savvy. 5. Fund raising/Service Organizations. Traditionally, men networked at their local Rotary or Lions Club meetings. While they raised funds for community projects, they were also exchanging a lot of business. Most of these groups are now coeducational and still function as networking opportunities. 6. Anywhere. You can network anywhere there are people. This means at the symphony, in line at the grocery store, while working out at the gym or walking the dog. Never pass up an opportunity to find out who someone is and what they do.
Where to find out about groups Check local newspaper listings for notices about networking groups in your area. Or check you library's copy of the Encyclopedia of Associations (Gale Research) and write for local chapter information. Ask your friends what groups they attend and see if you can go as a guest. Don't miss out on the wonderful possibilities that networking can bring to your growing business: new prospects, new friends, a wealth of new ideas, and the chance to compare notes with other business owners like yourself. Stretch beyond your comfort zone and meet some new people. You'll be amazed at the wealth of benefits.
Networking 101 Lessons from the School of Hard Knocks How do you build and maintain a network of professional contacts? Following are the answers from four human resource professionals. All four stress that networking requires giving as well as taking. Three of the networkers recommend having a formal system for keeping track of your network; one of them describes his computer database of contacts. Other pointers include a discussion of your "90second honeymoon" with each new contact, unusual ways to make creative networking exchanges, and the importance of common courtesy. George M. Smart Jr. President of Strategic Management Resources Chapel Hill, N.C. Networking makes you look ubiquitous, like you're everywhere. You're creating word of mouth. If you're talking to people, they're probably talking to other people about you. And most of the time, people talk positively about folks unless they've been given a reason to do otherwise. For me, it's like having a sales force of 2,300 people whom I don't have to pay. One of the most important things is just realizing that you need to build a network. Contacts are important even in departments that don't seem to be related or that have not expressed a need for your services. That builds up a personal power base, and is good PR. I got into networking with such zeal because I'm basically an introvert. I found that I needed more social skills. I thrust myself out there on the world and started to meet people. That was hard to do at first, but I realized that I liked it. And it's like second nature now. Smart's Recommendations 1. Learn how to make personal introductions that come across well and also convey what you do. People have this fear that other people won't take them seriously or will laugh at them. But that rarely happens. When it does, I just reminded myself of all the hundreds of thousands of positive interactions I've had. You never do away with the risk, but it's much less of a risk than most people think. Studies on communication show that the average person takes 90 seconds or less to make a judgment on new information. So if you're meeting someone for the first time, your honeymoon period with that person is about 90 seconds. You've go 90 seconds to convey information that will help that person to form a positive impression of you. Answer four questions when you're networking with someone for the first time: · Who are you? (Give your name, company and title.) · What product or service do you provide? · For whom do you provide that product or service? (For example, is this an internal function?) · So what? (Why is your service unique or better or important? What will stick in the mind of this person when you leave?) You also must allow the other person the same opportunity. You're forming opinions about him or her as well. And I often ask for a business card so I don't have to remember everything. After a particularly favorable interaction, take the time to write a personal note to the person, saying something like this: "Dear Jane, I enjoyed speaking with you at the board meeting and learning about your department. Enclosed is a brochure about my services. I hope that we can meet again in the future." A nice, handwritten note makes much more of an impact than something you whip out on a laser printer. 2. Following up with people is another key component of networking. I suggest that you somehow contact everybody in your network at least once every six months. That can be a phone call, a postcard, a letter, a memo, a meeting, or any other kind of personal contact. That's just to jog their memories and remind them that you're there. Every three to six months I send out a newsletter to practically every person that I have ever talked with. That puts my name and company and logo in front of people again. It reminds them that I'm out here. I usually do a cover story on some project that I'm involved in to let them know what kind of consulting work I've been doing. I started off using a pencil and paper system to keep track of my network. Once you have more than 100 or 150 names, you really need a computer. I use a very simple database that is wonderful. It's called PC File and is made by Button Ware Corporation. PC File enables you to set up a computerized Rolodex of names, addresses, phone numbers, and so forth. You can search through that by any of those fields of information. For example, if I remember only that your first name is Catherine and that you live in Washington, D.C., I can ask it to scan for all the Catherines in Washington and it will give me a list. The program will also dial numbers if you have a modem on your computer. The entry for each person in my network has a status field in which I put what happened in my last interaction with that person. If someone says to call in six months, I put down, "Call in July 1994." People are very impressed when you actually remember to call them in July 1994. I probably spend two or three hours a week doing strictly networking activities. In the beginning I was spending more than that probably a day a week because I was so enthusiastic about it and wanted to build a network quickly. 3. Make use of organizations that can serve as sources of contacts. I think the very best way to start is to join professional organizations. By far they are the best game in town in most places, to make contacts within your profession and to see what other people are doing. You meet people through national conferences and monthly chapter meetings. Some of my best contacts are other consultants; they're probably my richest source of leads. It seems contrary to conventional wisdom, but that's the way it works. Many people don't experiment with that because they view other people in the business as competitors. But most consultants with whom I come in contact don't do exactly the same thing I do. When you discover that your work doesn't overlap completely with another consultant's, that means you can refer clients to each other in those areas. For example, I do a lot of retreats. Some consultants I know don't want to fool with them. When they talk to clients who are interested in retreats, they refer those clients to me. I end up being a referral source for other people too. For example, I use the Myers Briggs in training, but I don't administer it. I have several people in my network on whom I call to administer Myers briggs instruments to people in my groups. Chambers of Commerce are good places to network. Join your local Chamber of Commerce, particularly if you are an external consultant. It allows you to meet people from a variety of businesses and make contacts. Anybody can join; many large companies are already members. I don't know if a lot of people take advantage of them as a resource, but alumni associations are great networks of people. If you've got a degree from anywhere, there is an alumni association near you. They are usually not that expensive, and they provide a way of networking with professionals at a college graduate level, even if you don't have a college degree at all. An alumni association's primary goal is to bring money into the campus, so it doesn't really care who joins. That's the case for almost all major universities. In other words, you can be a member of the Stanford Alumni Association even if you didn't go to Stanford. 4. Don't use networking as a sales tool. External networking is a wonderful way of expanding one's influence in a particular market. But if you try to use it as a sales tool, you will probably make more people angry than you will influence positively. If you ever go into a situation one-on-one with somebody and try to hard sell them through networking, it almost always results in the other person feeling pressured or cornered. Nobody like to feel cornered. Sales may result from networking, but the time lag is usually pretty long. You may make a sale as a direct result of networking, but it could take years to incubate. My newsletter is a sales tool, of course, but the networking really isn't except over the long term. When people in North Carolina think of organizational development, I want to be one of the first three people they think of. In many cases I'm the only person that they think of. When they think about that subject they can call me up or refer their friends or colleagues to me. That's where the real benefit comes over time. They're out there working for you. It may be that they just mention you to three people a year, but a personal referral like that is valuable.
Mary Gall Biebel I've never thought about having a network. The first thing I did when I started to think about this topic was to ask my friends for their ideas. Then it occurred to me: that was my network. Building a network or support system, or a series of contacts is a lot easier for some people than for others. Part of it has to do with your own personality. Part of it is learning not to be shy. Sometimes that's hard. Don't be afraid to reach out and network with people who are in a different part of your business. Don't limit your networking activities to people who do just what you do. Some of my best ideas come from people who are very far removed from the fields in which I work. Be open and truly interested in what other people do. Just listen not to get something out of it, or to use it in some way, but just to find out what people do. There is a lot of spill-over of ideas. They all fit together like a mosaic, little bits and pieces of all we have to offer. I think we have a lot to learn from each other. Biebel's Recommendations 1. Work on being competent yourself. If you're competent, people will come to you. There are different ways to show your competence. You need to find a non-abrasive way to articulate your competence. If you're competent, people will come to you. There are different ways to show your competence. You need to find a non-abrasive way to articulate your competence. If you're feeling a little shy or awkward, or if you're in a new organization, the temptation is to get in there and demonstrate your competence by challenging all other's competence. That turns people off. Find a natural way to demonstrate that you know what you're doing. A lot of people who come to me to network are really entry level. That's OK, but they think that they can build their competence by tapping into somebody else's knowledge. I don't think that's true. Work on your own competence as well as building a support network and people will start coming to you. 2. Make networking an interactive, two-way process. The best time to think about building a network is not when you need it. Say you have not been involved and don't have a support system. You haven't been out there and don't know the people. Then you suddenly lost your job or become a consultant and need to build up a client base of get basic information. That's an awkward time to call somebody, out of the blue, and say, "Let me network with you." I've seen that happen a lot. Be prepared. Think about what it is you want out of an interaction. If you're going to do it with someone who's not already part of your network, listen as well as talk. Listen to what that person has to say. Follow through with whatever commitments you make. If I tell someone I'm going to do something, I make it a point to follow up and send that article or get that name or make that phone call. I've been the recipient of it the other way, when I've followed through and the other person hasn't. That really leaves a sour taste in my mouth. 3. Really get involved in professional societies. It is the single best way to build a network of professional colleagues. Don't just join an organization. Most of us belong to multiple organizations. Don't just pay your dues; go to the meetings. Once you get to the meetings, get involved. Volunteer. It's a wonderful way to meet people and to learn what's going on. There's a wealth of information. When you go to conferences, don't be shy. Go up and introduce yourself to people. Get involved and get information about your particular interests. There are a lot of opportunities for people to get involved in professional organizations. They are always looking for people. And the organizations love it when somebody new who is competent comes in and says, "What can I do?" I wish people would be more proactive about volunteering what they know. 4. Instead of focusing on what you can get out of networking, think about what you can give. Think about what you can give back to the profession and to the people who are less experienced than you are. The people in my network are the most generous group of professionals that you can imagine. Someone will say, "Oh, are you having problems coming up with a better way to measure the effectiveness of that program? Here are five things you might try." They don't hold on to their knowledge. I see a lot of good consultants giving away information. They're not hoarding their secrets. There are enough problems out there for all of us to solve. Rosabeth Moss Kanter has a great statement: "It's not power that corrupts; it's powerlessness." When people feel really competent and powerful and personally and professionally strong, I think they're much more likely to give it away.
Susan Fenner When you look at that word "network," you think of a net; that would indicate communication in all directions. When you're building networks, don't network only in one direction. Some people only network down, because that makes them feel comfortable they're the ones with the knowledge and information. Some people always network up, looking at what's in it for them. Others network laterally. But if you only network with your peers, they'll just feed back your ideas; they'll be supportive because they're coming from the same area. If you network in a different direction, you may get really different feedback. Sometimes we're inhibited to network up. We hesitate to call a CEO or someone else who has a higher position than we do someone who makes more money. The trust of the matter is that often, networking up will give you more than networking down, but it's more threatening to network up. It takes a lot of practice and a little chutzpah. Fenner's Recommendations 1. In the best networks, everybody comes away from an interaction with something in hand or something in mind. Don't assume anything. Sometimes you may think what you need is so farfetched that you are way off base even asking for it. But sometimes you'll get pleasant surprises. In exchange, you may be able to fulfill a need that you can't even imagine. You may feel bad that you are looking for a handout, but with a network, you're really talking about an exchange between people. The other person may give you something, but you also give him or her something in return. I had some people coming to a convention as speakers. I really wanted to provide more information than what they could give in one hour sessions, so I asked whether they would be willing to write 12page modules that we could sell for cost. I thought it was a ridiculous request: these people had already agreed to give these talks, and now I wanted them to do this free stuff as well. But we ended up with a neat situation. They said they would be glad to do it for something that would be of value to them. Several of them agreed to do it in exchange for one page promotions of themselves within the modules. One trainer had worked with a voluntary action committee in her hometown and had developed everything I needed. She said, "Let me give you the name of this person. If you just credit her organization, I bet that she'll let you take that information and modify it." That was an example of a really effective, three way network. Always give something back to someone who gives something. And the sooner that you can do that, the better. I have a wonderful contact in Wisconsin. Every time I call that man, he makes sure that he has given me something before we get off the line. Sometimes it may be a bit of gossip within the industry that I would never have heard. Other times, he might say something like, "Well, what can I help you with? What are you working on now?" He has been a good role model for me. He is very good at making sure that every interaction is an exchange. That keeps a network fresh and moving. It's important that both parties come out with things of somewhat equal value, but that doesn't mean the exchange has to be an article for an article or a client for a client. Sometimes the exchange can be more creative. I am amazed at the things that you can work out if you don't focus on money and you're not afraid to ask for what you want. That can build up your network. Part of it is just saying, "I'm looking for a free speaker. If you can do it, what can I do for you?" Don't assume that you know what's going to be valuable to the other person. One year I handwrote thank you notes to all of the speakers at our convention. Practically every person wrote back and asked for a letter on letterhead. They wanted something that they could use in their promotional materials, to send to other clients. That really opened my eyes. This past year, for the first time, I asked the speakers if another type of tradeoff would be helpful. Speakers who received good evaluations could submit three topics of workshops they would like to sell, and I would do a mailing with that information to the presidents of all of our 730 chapters. It didn't cost me much, but it was worth a lot to the speakers. You have to really listen to people not just to what they say, but to what they mean. That is how a network begins. A lot of people don't know what they want. You really need to listen in order to get that information from them. And tell people what you want. Associate yourself with a particular kind of information or a particular need. Tell people that you're looking for it, and you'll get responses. You have to reinforce people who send you things. Immediately send them thank you notes. If one of my contacts knows that what she or he is doing is important to me, or if I'm writing an article and can give her or him some credit even if it's not by name that keeps the network going. The worst thing that you can do when you're networking is not to reciprocate, not to provide feedback. If someone abuses networking, the network is broken. 2. Look at every single call that comes in as a potential new network. Some days you may get the weirdest questions and the weirdest people calling you. But if you give 100 percent with every contact, no matter what she or he wants, you'll develop the best relationships. 3. Organize your network. I keep lists of names. Periodically I look through them and say, "Who haven't I talked to in a long time?" When I'm sending cards for Christmas or Halloween or Thanksgiving, I always buy four or five extra. I send those to people with whom I haven't touched bases for a while. That's been really effective. I have a set of mailing labels for people with whom I network frequently or with whom I want to network. When I find a great article, I look in my label files for someone who would love that information. Then I just pull off the label, stick it on an envelope, and send that person a copy. 4. Do not withhold information. At times, you may get burned, but in the long run, it's a good policy. At times, you may be dealing with proprietary information, but for the most part, get over the idea that someone is going to steal your idea. If you give people everything you have, it will come back a hundredfold. If I give someone an idea of mine, that person will frequently make it better. So I end up with a bigger and better idea than when I started. Other times, the person will give me a different idea in return. We all act at times as though we will never have another idea or piece of information as long as we live. So we protect our ideas and our contacts. But the people who are the best at networking don't hold back. When you really exchange ideas, you both come out ahead.
Frank K. Sonnenberg Networking opens up a world of endless opportunities. For some, it provides ideas for running organizations, sources for new hires, and a way to dispel rumors. On a personal level, networking can be used as a source of emotional support, career advice, or objective feedback about business decisions. If it is to be successful, networking must be a conscious activity. It is all too easy to fool yourself by making a real commitment, but the only person you fool when you do that is you. Some people treat networking like a game of business bumper cars. They join a lot of associations in order to have something to put on their resumes. Then they show up at meetings two minutes before they start, never make contributions, and never make an effort to get to know people on a personal level. Then, as soon as the meetings end, they frantically run around passing out business cards in an attempt to convince themselves they are networking. The truth is that networking takes work. And part of that work is changing networking from an unconscious to a conscious activity. You must network in a spirit of helping others, accepting the premise that you are making a long term investment that will ultimately bring you dividends. Sonnenberg's Recommendations 1. Networking doesn't happen by itself; networking takes work. If you want to network successfully, you must start by accepting the fact that networking requires an investment an investment that does not provide immediate returns. People who join groups for personal gain but who never contribute who believe that they are above it all are not really networking. Those with whom they are trying to network soon realize that they are takers, that they have no inclination to help anyone else. In truth, you will probably pay out more in the beginning than you will receive. The mutual support and trust that are the building blocks of every other relationship become the foundation of a good network. So don't wait until you desperately need a network to begin developing one. I always laugh when I watch people try to develop networks overnight and become discouraged when their attempts don't pay off. Become active in organizations; don't just grace them with your presence. That is why it is so important to be selective in choosing groups to participate in. Join groups with activities you enjoy so that you will be genuinely interested in them and have common interests with other participants. Part of the investment that you must make is to organize yourself so that you are in a better position to help others. Remember that you won't be much help to others if they have questions and you can't help them find the answers. Finally, remember that networks continually expand the contact. Therefore you must have a formal or informal system of keeping track of your members and of information that might be useful. 2. Remember that you don't network with groups. You network with individuals. Seminars, conferences, and committee meetings are not substitutes for one-on-one meetings. Because the set agendas that govern large meetings make it very difficult to focus on anyone's personal situation, you have to develop meaningful relationships on the side. These relationships take two forms. Many people say, "I only have very close relationships." Others say, "I don't like to be bound by close relationships." The truth is that both forms play very important roles in the networking process. People with whom you develop close relationships tend to be more like yourself, probably travel in similar circles, and really know what makes you tick. The looser ties of acquaintanceship allow you to obtain access to people with diverse backgrounds. The serve as bridges to other groups and help you find approaches that you would not normally think of. Once you identify the people in your network, the fun begins. There are three important steps to organizing your network. · Know and document the strengths of your members. Evaluate them based on criteria such as their ability to generate new ideas, alert you to new business opportunities, or provide you with competitive intelligence. · Divide the members of your network into categories so that you can easily identify the person to call when a need arises. For example, you should know who has experience in nonprofit or family run businesses. · Know your own strengths. Networking is a two-way street; you must be prepared to live up to your side of the bargain. If you are all take and no give, your network will not last long. Look for ways in which you can help others. 3. Know not only of whom, but how to ask questions. Always treat people fairly and use their time wisely. You will destroy relationships if you rush out and ask people to do you favors without thinking beforehand about what your request involves. Try not to embarrass people by asking for things they may not be able to provide. Make sure it is convenient for them to do the favor. For example, it may be a problem because they are facing a critical deadline that requires all of their time at the moment. It is important to ask for favors in the right way. Nothing annoys people as much as having to guess what someone really wants when they are trying to do a favor. 4. Common courtesy is critical to the future of your network; it determines whether your network increases in size or whether it dies. I'm really talking about the Golden Rule of networking taking care of the needs of those with whom you network, just as you want to have your needs cared for. The rules you should keep in mind: · Promise only what you can deliver. It is better to say you can't help than to say you will try and, three days later, bow out. The time lost may be critical. · Don't prove how knowledgeable you are by giving someone tons of information, making him or her sift through needless material to find the right answer. The quality of information is more important than the quantity. · Don't rely too much on a few people. You'll end up being a pest, always asking for favors and never being able to full reciprocate. · Make sure you are not intruding and making life difficult for those you tap. Find out when it is convenient for you to call. Start a call with, "Is this a good time or should I call back later?" · Avoid giving away or asking for sensitive information. Business ethics mandate avoiding asking for that kind of information from anyone, especially friends. You must never put people in that position. They may come through for you, but they will resent it. And you might be the one put on the spot next time. · Never use your contacts' name without first securing their permission. Even if these contacts are close friends, their organizations may prohibit the use of their name. · In the event that you are given the name of someone to call, it is a professional courtesy to keep the initial contact informed of any actions that are taken or results that occur. · People who allow you to use their name do so only because they assume you will provide the same or better service to others and that you will make them look good. (If you do not, you may destroy two relationships in the process.) · Never take someone's good nature for granted a "thank you" is a must. · When asking your contacts to speak on your behalf, make sure that you either know what they are going to say or see to it that you adequately prepare them with information to use. · In addition to fulfilling a specific request, suggest you can do more if you think you have something else to offer. But don't do more without asking. It's a lot like giving a gift: You should give people what they want, not what you want them to have. · Don't push yourself on people. You may mean well, but you will be guilty of the business equivalent of "smother love." Too much help can smother a relationship. These are the rules of correct behavior the rules of friendship. And that's what networking is about. It is relationship building at its best, with all the rewards that come from increasing your circle of friends, both intimate and occasional. Use caution at the outset. In order to establish a relationship, you often have to make the first move. But it is important that your initial gesture be something other than a request. For example, sending out promotional literature as an overture is not networking it is selling. You must know not only the strengths of people in your network, but their personal needs as well. Networking is not a one-way street: If members can't meet their own needs through networking, they will be far less likely to participate. To help others, try to understand their perspectives, rather than filtering information through your own biases. Be Prepared. You're not likely to be of any help to people in your network if you can't keep track of information that could solve their problems. Part of the investment you must make is to organize yourself so that you are in a better position to help others. One way to do this is to list the members of your network on index cards or in a computer and note information that might be of use to them when you hear it. Find the right approach. When you really need the help of your network, you have to decide which member to approach with your request and how to make it. Once you know exactly what you need, it is easier to choose the best person to ask. If timing is not critical, you can approach several members for help. And you can ask them to ask their contacts for help as well. When making a request, don't always seek the obvious; try to get different answers or perspectives on an issue. A writer, for example, may ask several people to read a manuscript: an expert in the subject area to review the content, an editor to evaluate grammar and style, a lay person to determine how clearly the material is presented (and how free of jargon it is), someone in the target audience to be sure the piece is pertinent, and a member of the writer's own organization to check for political sensitivity. Avoid mistakes. There are many ways to become an unpopular member of a network. · Don't use pressure. Although most people generally like to help others and give advice, remember that they like to be approached gradually. Be careful to assess the ability of the person you plan to ask. If you rush out and ask for help without thinking, you may embarrass people by forcing them to admit that they are not capable of helping. · Use other people's time wisely. Know what you want before you ask. Too many people pick up the phone before thinking things through. The result is a time consuming call, during which you and your contact try to figure out exactly what you need. This can be pretty embarrassing when it turns out the person you called is obviously not the right one to help you. · Evaluate the reasonableness of your request. Are you asking someone to take a big risk? Will it require a lot of time and money? Would you do it for the other person if the tables were turned? · Respect other people's priorities. Your request may be important to you and not seem to be a major undertaking, but the person you ask may have a full plate at the moment. He or she may just not have the time to help you. · Be specific. If you are vague, you may end up getting something you don't need. Tell the people you call what you need and why, and ask them how they would approach the same problem. This allows them to be creative; moreover, they may very well approach the situation from an angle you've not yet explored. Be sure to explain what has been done to date, so they don't spend valuable time and effort duplicating someone else's work. · Think about the way you phrase your request. Two networking executives, Pat Wagner and Leif Smith, cite examples of the wrong and right ways to ask for something: The wrong way: "I am dropping off 50 copies of my 110page business proposal for you to mail out..." The right way: "If I wanted to distribute my business plan to some interested network users, how should I handle it?" The wrong way: "Are there any people in your network looking for a smart investment deal?" The right way: "I have a high risk real estate deal for people looking for a legal tax shelter. The minimum investment is just $5,000." Reciprocate. When someone approaches you with a request, keep in mind that if you can't fulfill it, the next best thing is to recommend someone who might be able to help.
Sources: "Building a Chain of Contacts," Training & Development Journal, January 1991, p. 217. "How to Reap the Benefits of Networking," by Frank K. Sonnenberg, The Journal of Business Strategy, January/February 1990, p. 5962. "The Professional (and Personal) Profits of Networking," by Frank K. Sonnenberg, Training & Development Journal, September 1990, p. 5560.
Networking Organizations
Auxiliaries and Associations
Networking Clubs
Social Functions
Professional and Leisure Events
Women's Groups
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